Its been a funny ole week so far .. I started a new pointing week on Sunday and fell at the first hurdle, and I didn't make it back up until today! ... Kit Kat Hell grabbed me again and was compounded by an unexpected trip to Frankie & Benny's - I really cant be sure how many points I am in the red, but I think its somewhere in the 50+ region! For the first time since I started this, I just couldn't seem to get myself to care and ordered what I wanted to eat then and there instead of what I thought I should be having.
It's doubful that I will be able to balance out this week - But I still won't do the worst kind of "Draw a line" and write it off.. the irritation factor of that phase for me just never seems to get any less! -
Now I know that different people use this in different ways (I have been giving this a fair amount of thought lately after talking about it before) and that some are a lot better than others... If you use this as a tool to try and accept that you can't make the week balance without making yourself totally miserable and accept that you aren't going to try and aim for a totally in points week, but are just going to try your best to claim back as many as you can in a sensible way... then great! Go You! ... Its the other attitude that bugs the hell out of me.. the one where this phase is seen as a Get out of Jail Free Card, to be used time and time again as permission to ignore the reality of the situation you find yourself in and just start fresh with no regard to what you have done or how you got there in the first place! No matter how long I think about it, I'm never going to understand that kind of self-delusion.
My plan is simple enough - to try and save some points each day and balance this week out as best I can without making myself totally depressed - and I plan to get in an extra night of swimming which will net me an extra 8, much needed, ap's for the week. Now some may see that as me Drawing that line I hate! and in a way it might just be - but it's also me accepting that I'm human, that I fall down, that I fail to do what I set out to do sometimes, but that I am taking responsibility for those failures and doing what I can to recify them, while still not making myself feel like a bigger failure for not being able to make it all end perfectly .. That sounds resonable to me, what do you think?
And, on to that Jet-Wash I am sure you are all wondering about ... well, this morning I woke up still wanting to eat the wrong things, and knew that I so didnt want to do that for a 3rd day in a row. I needed to get out of the house, find a distraction that meant using my body to remind myself that I could do that so much better with the weight I am down already and to help me remember how much more I will be able to do soon if I can stay on the right path .. but I didnt have a lot of time, and couldnt go far .. so in a moment of inspiration I though I'd go wash the car.. cleaning anything always helps me clear out my head, and the phyical act of scrubbing and hosing the dirt off gave my arms a great work-out.. and the huge sence of satisfaction I got from seeing my car all clean and sparkly put me in such a great mood that overeating just wasnt on the cards anymore!
give it a go.. it works! xx
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